A Patchwork Life – Part 1

old-woman

 

Living and Breathing a Patchwork Life…

Life is a succession of achievements and failures, gains and losses, one foot ahead…two behind, saying hello and goodbye; the final good-bye leaves wounds that will never heal.  We must walk alone in our grief, yet it is universal.  Birth, death, reality, to experience life one must expect final good-byes!  As humans, we easily forget or do not take into account many of our losses in life.

A mother experiences pregnancy, but does not feel the loss of being pregnant until she realizes she has given birth to her last child.  Parents naturally take care of their babies, young children, teen-agers, but does not feel the loss as the years go quickly into having adult children; then they realize the house is empty…where did the years go?

I believe that we do not realize it at the time, but all of these disregarded little losses have prepared us for the major losses we will experience throughout our lives, the final good-byes.  Family and friends taken from us, young and old, there is a time for everything, a time to be born and a time to die (Ecclesiastes); we are never prepared.

It is essential that you remember that healing may take a life time; give yourself permission to grieve, to hide away, to remember, to cry, to smile, there is no set point in time when you are expected to heal!

I will continue to write my poetry as it has gotten me through many dark days since my child’s death and it has taken me four years of grief too finally express my collective feelings about the contents of these four paragraphs, this expression of my loss in writing will be ongoing in my blog.

My heart must look like a patchwork quilt, it keep breaking apart and I keep trying to mend it piece by piece, I hope my experience, my words will help others in some small way with their own losses throughout their lives.

©2014.apatchworklife.annjohnsonmurphree

 

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “A Patchwork Life – Part 1

  1. my favorite quilt I made was a “crazy quilt”
    I put energy of a lifetime in each stitch, stitching what I was thinking, feeling , seeing
    in fact all the senses were within it…I have been think of making one called my favorite things this year….in fact I know I will..I am tired of sad…
    your thoughts about life is so perfect in a quilt
    Your poem, your thoughts are so well stitched within the tapestry of heart language….
    you create a beauty in sadness…in loss…for how else could we feel your words if they weren’t spun of silver and gold sparkles…( I love sparkling things)
    I wish you the Best that is Yet to Be Ann….in all you do….
    Take Care…You Matter…
    )0(
    BlessedBe
    maryrose

    Like

    • Thank you so very much for your comments, it is only the 16th day of the year and I am trying to look into the past, present and future…I desperately need to let go of some things; yet I keep taking those “things” back out of the “throw away basket” and replacing them on the shelves in my memory. Have a blessed day. Ann

      Like

  2. Thank you so much for permission to grieve and heal on MY time as all my life I have tried to do it “the correct way” never knowoing what that was so I never grieved and I am 61 and have a lifetime of grief to deal with NOW all at once and I am truly overwhelmed at times. I lost a little girl when I was young and wasn’t allowed to go to the funeral because of my Mother’s controlling ways, stating it would be too much for her! I have so much anger over that. I missed what should have been a healing part of the loss b/c she was always in control of my life. Oh the regrets Ann…Keep writing it is salve to my soul. Fondly, Teri the walker with Lynn Stella and Bosy Date: Wed, 15 Jan 2014 00:41:44 +0000 To: terichamberlain@hotmail.com

    Like

    • Teri, a lifetime of control, years of “reliving”, and I believe that I am on the right path in my own mind. I have heard to often “time will heal”! This may work for others and I am happy for them, but will all the books on healing, grief and accepting it may not apply to all. I am one of all…I can forgive, but I cannot forget the “unfortunate happenings” during my life, I cannot forget those I have lost, the pain lives within and all of the books written did not help me. Therefore, I believe it is time to allow myself to grieve, forgive, maybe forget and heal in my own time. If it never happens, the words that come from within have help me survive. Hugs, Ann ps. Mason is ready for warm weather too.

      Like

Comments are closed.